picture-15.png

At last, the race is over. We came in fourth place, narrowly missing third place to Fellowship of the Van by under an hour. A $2 plastic ship spray-painted gold could have been ours! Congrats to Bloodshot and the Kilts who came in first and second place respectively.

For our rookie event, I think we did pretty well. If Eno had been able to make it, I have no doubt we could have captured third (the other option would have been to let the Fellowship of the Van drown in the river and beat them that way, but we’re just not that kind of team).

We’re also pretty sure we would have won the “People’s Choice” award for “Coolest Team” if a vote had been taken. We’ve got a lot of ESP skills, and by reading our opponent’s minds, we’re know that they liked us the best. We think it’s our modesty that gives us a real edge for that sort of thing.

Here are the race results:

1. Bloodshot 30:46 (hours:min)
2. Stillwater 32:27
3. The Fellowship of the Van 35:50
4. Enemies of the Common Good 36:45
5. A2 37:55
6. Team Lazlo 38:23
7. Lost in Place 39:11
8. The Millers DNF

And a few other statistics:

Race length: 8 days
States visited: 7 (counting D.C.)
Miles traveled: 2,108 (highway, not counting city miles)
Ham & Salami sandwiches: 18
Tires blown: 2
Fuel Cost: don’t ask
iPhone-to-Treo ratio: 4:1
Favorite City: Savannah, Georgia
Least Favorite City: Atlanta, Georgia
Hours Slept: not nearly enough
Beer Consumed: not nearly enough
Teams we rescued from the river: 1
Teams that rescued us from the RV: 2

Laptop falls from table to the floor: 5
Times a laptop fell on Scott’s head: 1

Times no one bothered to get the power supply from the top bunk, even though the laptop it was connected to had just hit Scott in the head while he was driving: 1

Times Scott got hit with a falling power supply: 1

Times we road with the fire extinguisher in someone’s lap,”just in case”: 2

Imagined runaway RV scenarios attended to by Mike: 1

Toilet pumpouts: 1
Number of jokes Collier made regarding said pumpouts: countless

Number of times the RV’s generator died: 5
Number of times it later came back to life: 4

In the end, we had a great time and it was quite an experience, RV issues and all. We really enjoyed hanging out with all the players (even Team Lazlo, though we hate to admit that). If anyone is looking for our team contact info, just email me at jeff-at-jeffready-dot-com and I’ll send it to you.


It’s been accurately brought to our attention that our blog has become incomprehensible to the world outside of the Ravenchase Great America Race. With a day of non-racing under our belts, we recognize that the level of inside jokes and references made in the blog have reached levels beyond which anyone could possibly understand.

Spending 8 days in an RV, traveling 1500 miles, and getting very little sleep, while trying to solve mind bending puzzles is bound to do this to anyone. Needless to say, we all got a little slaphappy by the end of the race. Keep in mind that all the people participating in this race, are, by definition, complete geeks. This leads to a lot of inside jokes, which often have roots in things that only super-geeks like us would have understood to begin with.

With that in mind, we’ve compiled a list of all the things you should ignore while reading the blog. These include, but probably aren’t limited to these references:

  • Sabotage by other teams
  • The Goddesh of Richmond
  • Where’s the Fellowship?
  • Leeroy Jenkins
  • All your base are belong to us.
  • Wiberty or Death
  • Voltron
  • Somebody set us up the bomb.
  • Oh Belvedere! Come here, boy!
  • For Great Justice
  • Ninjas
  • Russian Dancers
  • Alien Fashion Designers
  • Cat Patrols

To ignore these things, you might need to jump ahead a few posts. The posts from earlier in the week contain fewer inside references, and more real blogging.

Hopefully this helps.

PS – All Your Base really does belong to us.


We caught Team Lazlo engaging in some sort of strange, alien ritual.  Even our mad deciphering skills can not make heads or tails of this.  There is something strange going on in the background of this picture.

Something very, very strange.

library-lazlo.jpg

Where’s the Fellowship, you ask?  Probably as far away from this as possible.


We take a break from our regularly scheduled blogging to inform you of a disturbing development: It appears that Team Lazlo does not consist of three separate humans, but are actually one unified creature. That’s right, team members Marcus, Lucas, and Karin are all one in the same.

They are kind of like Voltron. Not the cool lion Voltron, but the stupid car-based Voltron that took so many pieces that you had to mow lawns for weeks to save up enough money to buy it, and then when you finally got it together you thought “Where’s the Fellowship? If they could see how stupid this thing looks they would be ticked off too…”

But I digress.

Take a look at the evidence yourself:

  • In the movie Domestic Import, Markus Lucas played the part of a Russian Dancer. Certainly this was a complex role, and was used to practice deception techniques so as not to tip us off to their borg-like nature.
  • Marcus Lucas is also apparently some kind of alien fashion designer, who advocates using religious garb to get one’s game on. Only an alien would think such things. Just look at the drawings in there. Furthermore, if you would take just one look at these “people” you would never mistake them for fashion experts. Long pants at Panama City Beach? Well played, Lazlo.
  • Karin alleges to work at Regis University, a catholic university in Denver where she went to school. However, she is always the designated driver for the team. A catholic who doesn’t drink? Do you take us for fools, Team Lazlo?

calendarmassenkoffrussian.jpg

Their own blog exposes their plans to wait until the end before crushing the other teams. It seems as though they mean “crush” in the literal sense, as they plan to take over the earth through alien conquest. This explains why we have not seen any meaningful attempt to solve puzzles on their part.

Consider yourself warned.

voltron.jpg


What happened to Panama City you say?  What happened to Panama City is what we say as well.  We rolled into town with 20 minutes to spare before today’s race started.  Earlier, we were told that Panama City would be a bonus day, with some puzzle games to win time back, and otherwise hang on the beach.

Dreams of renting jet skis, enjoying the water, and getting some reprieve from the blistering sun filled our minds.

Hopes dashed.

During our fiasco trip from Savannah, we were told that today would be a regular race day, and not a rest/bonus day.

Ok…

But then, when the race actually started, the instructions told us to get in the car, and drive to New Orleans.  There were 9 different driving clues, and after we get to New Orleans, there is a second stage for the day.

So we made it to Panama City, were there for all of 30 minutes, and back on the road again.  Curse you, Goddesh of Richmond.  I want my jet ski funtime!

And that’s where we are now, with New Orleans approaching ever so slowly, and a pile of clues to work through.

picture-14.png


Finally on the Road we headed for Panama City. After making the highway, the GPS reported our estimated arrival time as 4:43am.

Hmmm. Perhaps another plan was in order.

We opted to press on until about 1am, find a hotel, then get some sleep before waking up early to make it to Panama City before the race started. We made it to Lake City, Florida, a little west of Jacksonville. As we approached, I started searching for a hotel that had enough beds for the team.

This is when we uncovered yet another Bloodshot communist plot (I’m not 100% sure on the communist part, but I’m willing to jump to that conclusion). You see, there aren’t that many hotels right off of I-10 as you pass through Lake City, so a simple google search should give me just a few results in the area we wanted.

A Holiday Inn came up right next to I-10, I called, and they had two rooms. $60 each. Sounds great. I sent a text message to the team in the RV with the address. It was then that I realized “wait a second, this hotel says it’s in Kissimmee… that can’t be right…”

I brought google maps up to reconfirm the position, and see what the heck I did wrong. Just then, my phone buzzed with a simple text message from my teammates.

“WTF?”

Look, I know it’s late, but the last thing we need to worry about right now is the location of the Fellowship! Let’s stay focused, people!

Back at Google maps, I confirmed that the map was all screwed up. Coincidence? I think not.

Even at 1am I could piece this one together. Only Bloodshot has team members that work at Google, and they were clearly aware of our RV problems, being one of the earlier saboteurs. Our atlas correctly shows Kissimee as being near Orlando.  This map had Kissimee next to I-10.  I realized that what I was looking at was not operator error, nor an anomaly, but an obvious Bloodshot plot.

I also heard that they killed Kenny in an episode of South Park. Those bastards.

The evidence speaks for itself.

picture-12.png

We did finally got a hotel, and snagged 4-5 hours of sleep before getting up at six to press on to Panama City.


While slightly out of order, we wanted to make sure we brought this to the attention of the City of Savannah: they have a misspelled street sign in the city.

In fact, we have reason to believe that all the signs along this street are misspelled–anyone who has consulted with the Goddesh of Richmond is well aware that the proper spelling of this is “Wiberty,” taken from that great speech of Revolutionary War Patriot, Elmer Fudd, when he said:

“Give me wiberty, or give me death!”

liberty.jpg

Come on, Savannah, this is an embarrassment to your city, and to our country’s history.